Reaching out
From me to a friend.
Idk the status of you & your son but I was wondering, where do u get your strength from?
I'm.. Havin a really hard time right now w/o my boy. & as of now I still get to see him. Every thursnight til sunnight. But every sunnight after dropping him off, I get home n it isn't home u kno? His room, well our room just.. I mean I don't spend any time in there unless I'm getting some sleep, cleaning, or playing w/him. So last night I dropped him off, got home, got ready for my graveyard shift & left. Felt a bit depressed when I got to work but eventually shook it off. When I walked out of work this morning, I looked at the navy blue sky w/bits of pink coming thru & I interpreted that image as hope. Like, everything will be all right. & suddenly I was happy. So I'm feeling good, feeling great. Then I put my key in my door & I was hit with reality. Of him not being inside. He's not sleeping in his bed. Idk why I feel like I'm not gonna see him again whenever he's not WITH me. I just do. & his dad. Man. He's so mean to me. So mean. I was askin myself earlier, what the fuck did I do to deserve this. Why does he treat me like I did nothing for him when I gave him more than I ever think I could give to someone else. Can't he just think of our son? I work mad hard for mine, I hold my own. Struggle much but I manage. & he's spiteful & malicious but has a great job, new car, nice ass new apt.. & I'm just. Not. There. Yet.
*sigh*
I just. I know I wrote more than I initially intended to but I need strength & the point of this novel was to, I suppose, gain insight & strength from you because you feel me or vice versa to a certain extent.
No rush.
Thanks.
P.S. Good morning btw lol. Sorry :) Hope you're all right, Michelle.
Idk the status of you & your son but I was wondering, where do u get your strength from?
I'm.. Havin a really hard time right now w/o my boy. & as of now I still get to see him. Every thursnight til sunnight. But every sunnight after dropping him off, I get home n it isn't home u kno? His room, well our room just.. I mean I don't spend any time in there unless I'm getting some sleep, cleaning, or playing w/him. So last night I dropped him off, got home, got ready for my graveyard shift & left. Felt a bit depressed when I got to work but eventually shook it off. When I walked out of work this morning, I looked at the navy blue sky w/bits of pink coming thru & I interpreted that image as hope. Like, everything will be all right. & suddenly I was happy. So I'm feeling good, feeling great. Then I put my key in my door & I was hit with reality. Of him not being inside. He's not sleeping in his bed. Idk why I feel like I'm not gonna see him again whenever he's not WITH me. I just do. & his dad. Man. He's so mean to me. So mean. I was askin myself earlier, what the fuck did I do to deserve this. Why does he treat me like I did nothing for him when I gave him more than I ever think I could give to someone else. Can't he just think of our son? I work mad hard for mine, I hold my own. Struggle much but I manage. & he's spiteful & malicious but has a great job, new car, nice ass new apt.. & I'm just. Not. There. Yet.
*sigh*
I just. I know I wrote more than I initially intended to but I need strength & the point of this novel was to, I suppose, gain insight & strength from you because you feel me or vice versa to a certain extent.
No rush.
Thanks.
P.S. Good morning btw lol. Sorry :) Hope you're all right, Michelle.
