Emotional.
Titanic was a good movie right? Still, #1 movie of all time according to the sales n whatnot..
Many things that I like, if many others like it as well, I don't share them. I keep them to myself. And if I haven't expressed 'em through my actions I would eventually speak about them. It depends who you are I guess.
Things like stars. I love them. Loved them since I could remember. But everybody loves 'em don't they. And I don't like that. If everyones the same, it's just. It's not right. Because every real person knows what they love. They know and they try to express. So desperately and. Oh. I don't know.
I'm not sure what the point of this post is. I just know that there's one movie that brings out every side of me. Through the past 21 yrs of my life, I've gone through much, too much I think sometimes, but overall has made me and still makes me who I am today [haven't we heard that before, see? Smh].
I won't mention what movie that is but it's officially taken place of The Goonies, a movie that's been my all time fav up 'til tonight.
Love seems to make me succeed. I've realized that tonight. I don't want to date. I don't want to meet others. But I am looking for love. And honestly, because love is so complex, not to mention how abused it's been, I don't know what looking for love means. I don't know if it's a friendship, a lover, a partner, a soulmate, an associate, a pet, or simply yourself. Maybe it's God. Maybe it's that Almighty being that is much more than we'll ever be.
Maybe I need to search and discover.
Well, when I think of love, the first thing I think of is a male and a female. Sort of like what a marriage used to be, unity between a male and a female lol, okay. I think of a man and a woman being able to express themselves no matter what and growing together sharing stories. Respecting and loving everything about each other. At the same time, not being afraid of hurting each other's feelings 'cause at the end of the day you know you're crazy for each other. And you'll do anything to make them happy. You can say, "I hate you!!" knowing that you wanted to say, "You're the greatest love I've ever had. You've awakened my soul. I'm scared that I won't be able to have you love me the way I love you. Be with me. No matter what."
No jealousy. No envy. Nothing personal. It's not supposed to be a battle between you two. You're not supposed to make them feel bad. You're not supposed to be dishonest. You're not supposed to pretend you care. You're not supposed to manipulate them. You're not supposed to find happiness in making your spouse miserable. You're not supposed to make them feel inferior. You're not supposed to fix everything with money. You're not supposed to make impossible promises. You're not supposed to take, take, AND TAKE!! and. (sigh) and give nothing. You're not supposed to see them happy without you and desperately beg for them back. You're not supposed to be selfish! You're. Just. Not. (sigh).
You can't fix it. You've done what you've done. And yet, you can't be without me. And I can't be without you.
When is a man allowed to love fearlessly? When is it his turn to show her that he's been carrying such a burden because of his gender, not to mention his own mistakes. When will he give in? When will he know it's okay to look into her eyes and know that she's going to take care of him just as well as he will take care of her.
When will I love again fearlessly? A part of me doesn't want to feel it. Why? Because I think of more scars. But why? Why can't I think of a wonderful dream? Sunsets and candlelit dinners? Walks around the city, walks around the countryside? Perhaps laying down in the middle of the street one late night with that someone. Trusting them.
When is she to blossom again? When is she going to show him off and brag to her friends about what a great man he is? When will she sacrifice everything she wants just to be with him? When will it be okay again? When will she stop thinking about what he, or they want? And start thinking about what she wants.
When will it be possible?
When will she change the world?
Many things that I like, if many others like it as well, I don't share them. I keep them to myself. And if I haven't expressed 'em through my actions I would eventually speak about them. It depends who you are I guess.
Things like stars. I love them. Loved them since I could remember. But everybody loves 'em don't they. And I don't like that. If everyones the same, it's just. It's not right. Because every real person knows what they love. They know and they try to express. So desperately and. Oh. I don't know.
I'm not sure what the point of this post is. I just know that there's one movie that brings out every side of me. Through the past 21 yrs of my life, I've gone through much, too much I think sometimes, but overall has made me and still makes me who I am today [haven't we heard that before, see? Smh].
I won't mention what movie that is but it's officially taken place of The Goonies, a movie that's been my all time fav up 'til tonight.
Love seems to make me succeed. I've realized that tonight. I don't want to date. I don't want to meet others. But I am looking for love. And honestly, because love is so complex, not to mention how abused it's been, I don't know what looking for love means. I don't know if it's a friendship, a lover, a partner, a soulmate, an associate, a pet, or simply yourself. Maybe it's God. Maybe it's that Almighty being that is much more than we'll ever be.
Maybe I need to search and discover.
Well, when I think of love, the first thing I think of is a male and a female. Sort of like what a marriage used to be, unity between a male and a female lol, okay. I think of a man and a woman being able to express themselves no matter what and growing together sharing stories. Respecting and loving everything about each other. At the same time, not being afraid of hurting each other's feelings 'cause at the end of the day you know you're crazy for each other. And you'll do anything to make them happy. You can say, "I hate you!!" knowing that you wanted to say, "You're the greatest love I've ever had. You've awakened my soul. I'm scared that I won't be able to have you love me the way I love you. Be with me. No matter what."
No jealousy. No envy. Nothing personal. It's not supposed to be a battle between you two. You're not supposed to make them feel bad. You're not supposed to be dishonest. You're not supposed to pretend you care. You're not supposed to manipulate them. You're not supposed to find happiness in making your spouse miserable. You're not supposed to make them feel inferior. You're not supposed to fix everything with money. You're not supposed to make impossible promises. You're not supposed to take, take, AND TAKE!! and. (sigh) and give nothing. You're not supposed to see them happy without you and desperately beg for them back. You're not supposed to be selfish! You're. Just. Not. (sigh).
You can't fix it. You've done what you've done. And yet, you can't be without me. And I can't be without you.
When is a man allowed to love fearlessly? When is it his turn to show her that he's been carrying such a burden because of his gender, not to mention his own mistakes. When will he give in? When will he know it's okay to look into her eyes and know that she's going to take care of him just as well as he will take care of her.
When will I love again fearlessly? A part of me doesn't want to feel it. Why? Because I think of more scars. But why? Why can't I think of a wonderful dream? Sunsets and candlelit dinners? Walks around the city, walks around the countryside? Perhaps laying down in the middle of the street one late night with that someone. Trusting them.
When is she to blossom again? When is she going to show him off and brag to her friends about what a great man he is? When will she sacrifice everything she wants just to be with him? When will it be okay again? When will she stop thinking about what he, or they want? And start thinking about what she wants.
When will it be possible?
When will she change the world?
